The Jokes God

Oh my god.


So first the jokes god delivers us a northern 50 yr old woman who is full of woe and provides us with quotes and jokes for days, but now we have two gypsies staying here. The man, is about 60 with a GREY BOB and a rat face with a bent nose and a voice like the paeodofile from family guy who wears a customised straw hat and tries to talk to ME and look at ME and I look away because I dont want to listen or hear him eat and he breathes through his nose when he eats and I want him dead.

The woman is 30 and has a northern accent and sounds stupid because she says things like 'it were nice' and thinks everything which comes with melted cheese on is lasagne and asks sam if he has tried cucumbers for his HAYFEVER.

They also EAT the weeds and they repeat the SAME joke twice to each person, by saying "I got me own back on the weeds" and "missed a bit" to us. HILARE.

Saw a place called St. Hilaire yesterday.

AND THEN,

our hosts daughter arrives, who is CLINICALLY OBESE and wearing a Pale pink pyjama set!!!! wtf


So now we have to sit at the table with these people each night and try not to die. Tonight we have to go for drinks accross the road at the place where the other English couple live, who are death as well, and ALL GET TOGETHER. Me and Sam are like kids who don't wanna go but have to because we were told to. HAHAAAA