Leaving english summer

Ok so we packed up all our stuff and waited for simon to arrive, thinking he would be standardly late. He arrived and HURRIED us into the Van which he was revving whilst we were saying our tragic heartfelt heartRIPPING goodbyes to our family for the last fucking 6 weeks. He then nearly DROVE OFF without tristan/running him over.

So we descended down the mountain (1000ft) of WINDING ROADS literally seriously curlywurly and he ROOOOOOSTED it. Like 120mph the whole way. We braced ourselves for our lives around every corner, our suitcases were having a party in the back swinging all over the place breaking every valuable and our stomachs were like GET FUCKED SIMON.

We arrived in Lespluga and Paul vomited into a nearby bush which he described as 'fanta coloured sick'. Notice how we cannot even describe things without using English Summer themed points of reference. How will we survive the normal world?

We got to Tarragona on the train and found a dutty place to eat with chubby porn on the table so left and found a place where the air BURNS YOUR EYES. I ordered what i thought would be a nice prawn fresh salad type thing and the others got pizzas and pasta and when it arrived it was a bowl of OIL.

We raaaaan to the train station and nearly missed our train to Barcelona and in the process didnt manage a proper goodbye to Dearbhla, it was a blown kiss accross the platforms. Fail. Starting to think we are in a film now.

We, me paul and tristan (lets go eagles lets go) got on the train to Barcelona and caught some sleep, and then...

As we got off the train Tristan panicked, realising he didnt have his wallet. SO, he ran back onto the train to see if he'd left it. After realising it wasnt on the train he proceeded to EMPTY his ENTIRE bag out on the train while the train was waiting to leave, Me and paul were like shit shit shit tristan get off the fucking train and he was just like no i havent looked properly. So paul and I were like shit Tristan quick but he was just standing in despair with all his stuff around him and then the doors closed and the train slipped off. The look of sheer defeat sweeping his wee face was a picture. WE are definately in a film now where one by one they cant survive outside the camp and slowly die off. We motioned to him to call us, but neither of us have phones. Fail

THEN

we had to find my hostel so we referred to the directions Vic had given us (get to a certain metro station) and so we did and then tried to find the address. After about 30 mins of walking backwards and forwards and up and down and around and in and out and shaking it all about we asked a thousand passers by some girl finally said round the corner the first door. No sign. Nothing. NO SIGN NOTHING. the only sign of the existence of the hostel was a faded label over the top of a fucking DOORBELL.

SO we got in and it was on first impressions, interesting. dirty as hell but whatever and a sweaty man walked past.

ALl good tho, but we were in a proper desolate part of the city where it looked like something newsworthy had happened and everyone had left. We got to a place called placa del glorious catalans or something and it was pretty much a GRAVEYARDESQUE playpark

Then we wandered around into town and down La Rambla and found the AMAZING VEGAN ALL YOU CAN EAT MAOZ!!!! still there, the best place in the world and more rainbow food all for 5 euros. Then there was a fruit market and amaaaaazing sweet and we bought smoothies and then we went to the placa where i stayed in 2007 and looked and its so cool being back there and then we went to a BLADE SHOP hahaha with CHAINMAIL Suits and i wanted to buy one for Sam but they were priiiice. They also sold vegetable peelers and corkscrews for the low budget wannabe stabber.

Then, epic hostel adventure part 2...

We asked a man in a hostel for a room for Paul and he said no but pointed to a circle on a map and said go here. SO we spent about 4 hours trying to find this circle on the map like total fassios. Paul keeps saying safe and i am proud. We finally found an amaaaazing hostel for him right in the centre and really cool and really cheap and it incudes breakfast. I tried to buy a camera but the flash doesnt work. Fail.

a man called MOZZIE came up to us and said (in an austrailian accent) hey guys is that tinge in your hair intentional? to paul and then asked what we were doing tonight and we were a bit like erm and then he was trying to sell a bar crawl to us but none of that. WE are having a thousand for OUR road on OUR own because WE DONT LIKE STRANGERS WE ARE FROM PRADES. It is SO weird being out of English Summer. Earlier i saw a makeup stand. AND a McDonalds Sign. But everything keeps slipping back to English summer, like Prada is now called Prades unintentionally and we have literally a thousand froggy dollars on us that we are splashing and spunking like it's froggy's birthday!


Now we are sat in the bar of Pauls hostel and we have sangria and it is all good. But we havent heard pananmericana today OR waka waka OR alive and we are going a big mad.

hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

superjokes

BARCELONA"!" sick